According the last night’s Archers it is now Lent. And due to a couple of incidents that may or may not have happened yesterday (they happened) I have decided to give up 1) FAGS and 2) SUGAR. Here’s why.
First off. A painful trip to the dental hygienist who has become particularly aggressive of late and loves to tell me all about how if I don’t get into my massive gum pockets with the floss, them pockets will get bigger. And bigger. Now those of you who know me will be unsurprised to hear I do not want anything getting bigger in my mouth. There’s far too much massive stuff in there already (c.f. a seventies racing horse of your choice). By the time I was swilling the blood out she asked if I still smoked? No, I lied. And are you flossing every day? Yes I lied. The only other relevant and shaming question she didn’t ask was: would you ever consider making an entire batch of raspberry buns at 10.30 pm and then eating them all yourself?
Which brings me to the second thing that happened Making an entire batch of raspberry buns at 10.30 pm and then eating them all myself.
Ah I just remembered a third thing. I went bra shopping.
There’s an odd visual trick when you read this post on a laptop screen that initially only shows the top of the illustration on the screen. It does looks like it could be a photo of some alarming polyp, making the reader get through the paragraph with some trepidation… Then scroll down and what was disgusting is then revealed to be delicious! Even if only good for you in moderation.
oh god. that’s distressing but somehow perfectly appropriate…